7 Things I Wish I’d Known Before Becoming a Parent

Ah, that time when I was young, wild (alright I’m still a bit wild), and free… well, child free.
I had no idea what it would be like to be a parent.

I didn’t have a CLUE.

If only I’d known exactly what I was getting myself into… would I have changed my mind?
Hell no. I just would have done things a bit… differently.

1. TIME

Honestly, time becomes incredibly precious when you become a parent. And it’s precious over the most ridiculous things as well (especially when you have a young baby), such as;

  • Hanging out the washing
  • Sleeping
  • Eating in peace
  • Having a shower
  • Cooking dinner
  • Sleeping
  • Cleaning the house
  • Did I mention sleeping yet?

You feel like you’re constantly on the go. Between a haze of feeding, changing nappies, providing cuddles, calming tantrums, even the most mundane tasks can be difficult to complete.

I wish I’d treasured my time.

Used it wisely.

I never realised how much I would crave it until a little Kylie came along.

2. YOUR RELATIONSHIP

Man, why the hell did no one tell me that a child can put an immense amount of pressure on your relationship?

Hang on, someone probably did and I ignored their advice. Yep, that sounds more like me.

Don’t get me wrong there are days when I look at my husband and think I’m the luckiest woman alive. He’s an amazing Dad to Casey and I love the shit out of him, but… there are other times when my tolerance is at an all time low and I want to punch him in the face.

Luckily, I don’t.

And your both sooooo tired, it’s easy to snap at one another. Because, at times, you have nothing else to give.

I wish we had treasured the “us” moments before we transformed into a family, because those moments are now few and far between.

Enjoyed date nights.
Gone away for the weekend.
Stayed up all night talking.
Just being together.

During the year we’ve had one big night out together where we went to our friends’ wedding, stayed in a hotel, and came home before 11am the next day.

Prior to becoming a parent, we’d have lots of fun with each other and friends. I just didn’t realise how much I’d miss those times.

It’s easy to put your relationship on the back foot when a little life needs looking after.

3. MONEY

Who knew how expensive kids would be? Thank god we only have one.

I should have researched the shit out of what stuff costs and I darn well should have bought stuff second hand because before you know it, your baby will have outgrown it and then it’s of no use.

Like a decent stroller is worth $800.
Then there’s the car seat – another $500.

That shit starts to add up quick. REAL quick.

Oh, and that going down to one wage thing? Yeah… it’s certainly an adjustment.

Even more so when your husband changes careers at the same time. It’s amazing how you can get buy on a quarter of what you once earned as a couple.

Shows how much money can be frittered away doesn’t it?

4. HOBBIES

There’s a bunch of crap I wish I’d done before I shot out a child. Okay, maybe not shot out… after all, she did come out the sunroof so let’s go with ‘birthed a child’? Anyway, you get the drift.

  • I wish I’d traveled more.
  • Wrote more.
  • Socialised more.
  • Drunk more?
  • Even studied more.

I wish I’d up-skilled when I had more free time. Used my time to grow, to learn, rather than sit on the couch and watch back-to-back series of television series on Netflix.

You get it now, don’t you?

5. BODY IMAGE

A sensitive subject for some, but I wish I’d appreciated my body more.

I look back now and I’m like “damn girl what were you worried about?! You wear those little dresses and hooker heels and you own that shit!” (Hahaha I’m literally laughing as I write this, I really do think I’m hilarious – mind you – it’s two minutes shy off midnight and I’m sleep deprived…)!

I just never realized how much my body shape would change.

Or that I would want to get rid of half my (awesome) wardrobe because it was too short/tight/grunge/not-mother-material.

I certainly wouldn’t have complained as much about my weight because I had a pretty great body and well, let’s just say she ain’t what she used to be…

6. LOVE

Nobody told me I could love like this.

I mean sure, I had no doubts I’d love this little human I’d carried for nine months… I just never knew how much I would love her.

Remember when you were a teenager and you had your first ‘real love’? And no-one understood how much you loved each other because you were perfect together?

Yeah… Nah.

That love ain’t got nothing on the love you’ll feel for your child.

Even my husband can see how much I love our daughter. Of course, I love him, he’s my everything too – but this is a different sort of love.

It really is that I’d-jump-in-front-of-a-train for you love.

And it grows. That part surprised me even more.

Every day I look at this mini me, with her big personality, her cheekiness, and my heart swells.

Even the times when she tests me and it’s been a rough day, her little smile makes it all worthwhile.

7. SLEEP

Oh yes, sleep. That delicious five letter word.

When our body completely relaxes.
The magnificent way we recharge for the next day.

Yeah. Say goodbye.

A close association with our friend, time, sleep is the quickest thing most new parents start to miss.

It’s actually a massive credit to the human body as you go into survival mode and you’ll blow yourself away with how much you can do on two hours sleep.

And goodbye sleep ins.

Man, I forgot how much I loved a good sleep in. Not all the time, but just once a month would be incredibly satisfying.

Nowadays I’m up before the sun rises. Hell, I’m up before the birds chirp. It’s that early.

Yet all of that aside, being a parent is still the best thing in the world.

It just goes to show that you’ll give up anything for love… time, money, sleep. None of it matters when you hold your baby in your arms. All you feel is immense love and you realise just how lucky you are to be a parent.

It really is the best thing in the world.

 

ABOUT THE AUTHOR

Kylie is a survivor. She’s endured events that no-one should have to experience. That’s why she wants to share her story; to help other women live beyond their pain so that they too can take control of their life, and live the life they deserve.

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